Also, I need to come clean about something

After my mom bought me my first pair of Loubs for my high school prom (Lady Peep 150 mms), I was hooked. Addicted. I would gladly whip out my already maxed out credit card for a pair of these freakin shoes. They look absolutely FANTASTIC. They make your legs look a) coke diet skinny & b) supermodel long. But then it hit me. Taking your heels off in the booth is NOT a good look. And almost crashing your car because “my feet are so fucking numb I couldn’t feel the break!!” is not a good excuse. It’s like the soles are red to pay tribute to the blood on my feet. Ew. How am I supposed to look good while I’m falling over, regardless of the twelve grey goose sodas that are splashing around in my stomach. My usual mantra “Beyonce wouldn’t take her heels off” doesn’t even help in this desperate situation. I’m gonna stick to my padded Pradas from now on. Or even better *hint hint* platform Jeffrey Campbell’s for all nighters. I’m sorry Christian, but this relationship just isn’t working anymore.

Also, why does nobody talk about this? Like you’re weak if you admit your feet hurt or something. LOUBOUTINS blow okay? I said it. Fucking sue me (please don’t). Nobody is happy in those shoes, I promise. I feel like it’s some conspiracy, like woman saying childbirth is amazing 

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